A Virtual Micro-class
The Power of a Positive No
This time for women in particular!
Tuesdays, October 3 & 10 at 11 am pacific
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"How does generative communication
build “we-are-in-this-together” thinking
while also amplifying individual mental health?"
(This being a muse, my response may meander:)
On a walk my friend Kathy told me about a doc she’d streamed on the ocean’s depths. Distinct underwater creatures “affiliate” (her word) by swimming alongside and helping each other.
As a Communication Coach I am also a word nerd.
My ears perked up hearing Kathy use “affiliate” less formally than usual and liked how this one word captured an essence of Generative Communication. It is ensemble work that is trust reliant, safety reliant, belonging reliant –we are in this together reliant. It's as if you and your crew swim fluidly in tandem with each other. This happens without crowding the creature alongside you, aware “I am a clownfish” and “you are an anemone”, even as we head in the same direction or project, mission.
Marine biologists use the term mutualism.
We humans possess Relational Intelligence. The mind is in discourse with itself and is refined through discourse with others.
So first and foremost, Zach, Generative Communication provides a kit of tools to facilitate this human gift. GenC, is invitational -extending the offer to "inquire with me."
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GenCom works on all the days.
Yet...
We live aware of the resonance of global displacement. Being surrounded by plenty of others doesn’t always erase this; to be recognized in your difference does.
There's so much to get done it feels ever so natural to override curiosity about what's right in front of our nose: how everyday convos generate a life. In the face of that I am honored to guide spirited doers, in fast moving worlds -achievers and contributors ready to walk out of the revolving doors of ineffective communication. Their own, and others.
The story beneath the story about the "effective" communication we all clamor for, is one about self-agency. Here's where I get to roll up my sleeves guiding a GenCom framework to turn the light inward in the face of all the externalities designed to grab our attention. That said, the method also insists on a dynamic balance between your inner world and your actions IRL.
To clarify prudent action for yourself, then test it out in real time alongside others engaged in same is where the rubber of self authorship meets the road of results. Your crew transforms into a respectful master-mind group for seeing how diverse others resolve challenges and celebrate victories. Neuro-plasticity confirms the human ability to regulate emotions and thoughts priming the brain to expect good as you get bonding momentum going.
For achievers loving the driving force of accomplishment this combo of individual and group capacity building is heaven sent.
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Serious play!
Growing up playing in Brooklyn streets we took stick ball seriously.
If you had a question, wanted a do-over, clarification, an ask about the fairness of a previous call or an alteration of the ground rules on the fly, raising a hand and yelling “Five Fingers!” meant you needed a time-out.
Though we shouted, disagreed or cursed standing in the Brooklyn street chatting someone's "Five Finger" request, it never devolved into endless talk. Returning to the game dominated; we knew what mattered.
Generative Communication echoes “Five Fingers!" It's a framework with strategic pausing points planned in to regroup, offer or request feedback or ask “Are we still on the right strategy?”, “What’s missing?"
And GenCom includes that simple, essential underpinning to mental health, asking “How are you doing?” or "How can I help?"
Hustle entwined with reflection is a smart way to play.
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"Philosophy is what is under your nose".
- Nietzsche (1843 - 1900)
You can get there in style or fraught with interpersonal pain. We’ve all been on both sides of this coin. In the pressure cabin of work-life and life-life, GenCom is a safety valve. Never a flimsy gloss but an ensemble practice you calibrate to match the moment, mood or strategy as it unfolds in front of you.
To modulate your participation, contribution; to delineate and author your identity as a collaborator – that's the high art of teamwork. The opportunity: working shoulder to shoulder with someone while having the leeway to mess-up, refine and shape who you are as you go.
It’s ok to ask a question or for feedback, raise an objection, disagree or recalibrate direction. The bottlenecks of going full steam ahead without considering the humongous role of interpersonal impact is so inefficient.
Let me fess up, Zach.
Truth be told I'd have put aside facilitating GenCom crews long ago if not for being captivated by how sustaining immersion in human future facing collaborations are. Up close and personal, I’ve experienced, in tandem with client teams or my excellent students, the well-being a "We are in this together" mindset generates. A proven formula for mental health is when it is safe to show up as yourself. Quirks, questions and all.
The nicest bonus? Learning the ropes of GenCom predisposes you to a functional optimism and that oh-so-soundless emotion, hope.
Entering the zone of an opportunity mindset is an everyday practice and a rigorous philosophical view. Without negating what’s happening in the world, it provides a modicum of mental health. When you do this alongside peers the climate of good feelings quadruple and remain.
